the single life of a non-single girl: it's not ALL bad

well...i realize i have been gone from this page forever. i've known it for awhile now. i've thought about getting on here and rambling on about some lovely wedding stuff, or griping about the plumbing, or bragging about some fun times. i've thought about it. but truth be told, i just haven't felt like it. i haven't felt like talking about me because sometimes i find me to be pretty boring, and sometimes i just want my thoughts and things for myself. but mainly i haven't been on here because this little place i have here in the big world of the internet seems so insignificant in comparison to the real world. the world kind of sucks lately. not sure if you've noticed, but it does. one word. japan. it is so awful to see the destruction and think, wow! that is pretty amazing. and it is in a scientific way. but then you think, oh my god, those are homes and cars and people! that is their life, and here i am watching in awe from the comfort of my secure, dry, intact home. it is hard, sitting here and really, REALLY thinking about it and actually believing it. i can't even begin to imagine what it really looks like, feels like. can't imagine. makes me so sad for all of them, but what makes me even more sad is to see people posting on facebook, saying "good, they hate us" and "no way i'm donating" and other things of such tacky taste. i really wish i could somehow get through the thick heads of such people and, truth be told, shake the shit out of them. but, i don't think that's allowed. the thing is, an event such as this, a NATURAL event, is in no way related to politics. or even religion (although some might disagree). these are people. these are families and friends, just like "us" whose whole world was just, literally, destroyed. have some compassion. i don't care if you give money or not, or if you hate them or not, just keep your trap shut! it could very well happen to you at any given moment.

another thing that has really put a damper on optimism and butterflys and lollipops happened very near to my life. my work life. i work in many, many small towns and counties. one morning i was on my way to watonga, about an hour or so northwest of oklahoma city, for an 8th grade wellness day. i get a text about a murder. the victim, a little girl. i won't go into any details that i know, which is nothing more than what the news has said, but an 8 year old girl was killed by a relative, who then tried to bury her in a field. this is the stuff you see on tv. it doesn't happen around "here", wherever your "here" may be. to think of this little girl, and what those terrifying moments must have been like, breaks my heart. and to think that people of the murderer's mentality exist, is beyond scary. but they do. and they live in our world. it's reality.

so, not to be a complete debbie downer, but these are the things that have kept me from writing. to try and sum up things of this magnitude in a few words is nearly impossible. but to not speak of them would be heartless.

now that i've brought you down enough, let me lift you back up with some pictures....